EEK! There's a MONSTER in my closet!

This post is brought to you in part by Gnarls Barkley's "The Boogie Monster"

So...I'm in Atlanta...checking my e-mail, after a long, eventful, yet fun-filled evening. I check my feeds and read Boome's blog (I've mentioned her before), and she talks about happiness...blah blah blah, some more Oprah foolishness. Actually this one is pretty relevant to me, right now on today.

Happiness is something I think about often. I am always thinking, man I just want to be happy above all else what is that feeling like I wonder...So I took Oprah's, or whoever's quiz on oprah.com to see "Are you happy" The scores range from 0-35, I scored a whopping 16, WOWZER, don't kill me happiness! 31+ means you are happy with your life and its components, under 15 means you're seriously dissatisfied with your life, and need to make changes ASAP. In between, means you are still searching for the things that make you happy, blah blah blah.

Took another quiz and these are the results from the "What are you hiding" quiz on Oprah's website. "You're repressing a considerable amount of emotion and information, and this affects your daily life in negative ways. You sometimes behave irresponsibly, or even destructively, at work and in relationships. You could benefit from reading psychology or self-help books that interest you and therapy would be enormously helpful."

POW, BANG, BOOM! Hit me where it hurts!!! Okay, okay, I got it "Shanette, you're miserable!" So...whose fault is that??? I think I am trying to find someone to pin this whole thing on you know...so is it your fault...hmm...naan I think its mines! So SURPRISE BITCHES! The Monster is ME (remember that Sesame Street book, with Grover about the monster, and turns out he is the damn monster, that was my fav child book too...go fig.)! I am afraid of myself, my feelings, my thoughts, my intelligence, my potential. What does that mean exactly, well it means, I can't excel until I accept my situation for what it is, say its no ones fault but it is what it is...now will I allow that to make or break me is the next question? Hmmm...Well of course I say NO! However, if I don't make a move like yesterday, you know that stuck feeling I was complaining about, may actually come to pass...

So SHANETTE! This is to you, yourself, and uh...yeah, YOU! LET’S GET IT! We have nothing and hells I do mean nothing to lose! Like I heard in church one time, who am I not to have all I desire...I mean really think about it...if I am God's divine creation, and I am...who am I not to have, to do, to be, all that I want in this life...so...with that being said...I am commanding all monsters, to FALL BACK, bitches! You don't control me! I control me...all those little fears, insecurities, and flaws are meager, minor details that can only have power if I allow it...and I don't! YAY for me! WOO HOO! Revelations...was that really a revelation??? I'd say no, but it is motivation and starting....right....NOW...I am back on my full time grind--->thanks Yo Gotti!

My quest for happiness...while it maybe never-ending I can be enthused about the quest versus being bitter about the contentment.

POB!

(I really am having a GRRREAT time in the A...woo hoo...I might have to move on down here mane!)

~S. Parks