What are YOU Sowing?

Hey guys & gals,

Sorry I’ve been away for so long…I don’t really have an excuse…I just haven’t really felt like writing (or typing so to speak).

I’m back now though & that’s all that matters is the present, right? Right.
So the other day I was reading this month’s Ebony magazine w/Tyler Perry on the cover, a mag which I rarely read-btw, was surprisingly quite good overall.

I really enjoyed this particular article, "What are you Sowing," about Ms. Tasha Smith, best known for her role in his (Tyler Perry) movie Why Did I Get Married? Amongst other movies, as well as appearances on TV shows like Tyra Banks’ ANTM, she’s the chick who kinda always seems to have a really fucked up attitude (in the characters she portrays).

Anyways, in this article she talks about how she was that girl who always had a bad attitude, that girl who’s always getting into it w/people & blaming them for the confrontations, that girl who always thinks she’s right & ain’t tryna hear shit nobody got to say…until she did some re-evaluating, some self-discovery & found that she was the problem. The energy she was putting out there was in turn manifesting itself in her life & how others treated her…how ironic huh?! I think that’s what they call karma.

Basically she was reaping what she was sowing? All that negative energy she was displacing was bouncing right back onto her w/o even realizing it…her unhappiness, her inability to forgive, to let go & let God was inhibiting her growth, her progression, her destiny. Not until she took responsibility for her own actions & moved beyond her hurt & forgave & forgot those who had wronged her in the past, did she move forward & become the success she is today. She found self-love…the key ingredient to being happy…it starts from within! The contentment she sought after & confusingly mistook for something she could find in things or other people, was within herself all along. She then began to spread that joy, just b/c it made her feel good to make others feel great & so the cycle continues…

That article was all too familiar to me b/c I was, still kinda am that girl.
I was once known to have a wretched attitude, it isn’t the best as of yet, but it has come a long way, but I can see myself reverting to my old habits, my old mentality, my old attitude b/c of situations or things that I seemingly can’t control?

It’s hard to see beyond the obvious sometimes, by that I mean, as human beings we waver in our faith, in our commitment to our promises, in our ability to remain steadfast in what we know to be the means for greatness. We like to shortcut, to blame, to forget who we are...in God...what we’re capable of & the power we possess! We sometimes let the world, society & even the company we keep, dictate how we view our lives, as it should/shouldn’t be. We falsely base our happiness on what we can see & touch vs. what we believe & how we feel.

I know I am a work in progress & as I rapidly approach the BIG 2 5, I’m reminding myself daily that just b/c I can’t see my success, I still have to see my success. I have to believe it to be so & live as such. Being unhappy until… Being bitter until… Being temperamental until… I’ll never make it past the until…I will always be waiting, allowing myself to get in the way of my destiny!

That can’t be my life, that’s not the life I had planned! That’s not the life I’ve worked hard for! Most importantly that’s not the life that God wants for me, that he has for me & that’s the only thing that keeps me focused!

If I’ve learned anything in my time in Memphis it’s that life doesn’t always work the way we would like it, but it’s better when we roll w/it & do it w/a smile, otherwise you’ll be miserable forever & I’m far too fly to be miserable, makes you age fast & die young & I’ve got too much to do w/my life, how about you?!

So my advice would be (if this @ all applies to you in some form or fashion), fake it till you make it…I’m not saying don’t be you b/c you know I’m a firm believer in the realness baby…like Plies says “I went to sleep real, woke up realer!” I’m just saying put out there what you want back, don’t be so judgmental, so critical, so arrogant, and so bitchy that you can’t recognize the next person’s swagger & how they can benefit you, that you can’t bless someone else that you can’t be pleasant, encourage others…recognizing greatness in others doesn’t negate your greatness, it makes you greater!

All I’m saying is the power is within…think it, feel it, speak it, do it!
…guess it’s about time I start taking my own advice…the hardest thing to do!
I can preach all day bay but can hardly follow the rules…I’m on it though…getting too old for the foolishness anyways!

Anywhoo…

Be Happy. Love you. Spread the love. & Give God the glory always & forever!

~Shanette R. Parks