SHE's just not that into you...

This is for Markita.



I have absolutely NO idea how you know when a girl's just not that into you b/c I'm a boy, lmao!

I kid, I kid...kinda...I may not be the best person to ask how do you know when a girl's not that into you b/c I'm never into anyone + I don't like to do stuff most girls like to do...but I'll try to think more like a girl & less like...well...myself.

When she doesn't know that you're into her...see girls are kinda different even if they aren't into you they still want to think that you would be into them even though they aren't even into you...wait maybe that's how guys & shallow girls are...idk!
Well I think when a girl doesn't know that you're into here its easier to tell when she's not into you...girls for the most part are touchy-feely however sometimes when they are into someone they won't be...so depending on how she hugs you...is it a friendly hug like upper body hug or is it more physical, like full body.
Oh here's a big one...does she talk to other guys in front of you, she's definitely NOT into you if she will talk to another guy in front of you, unless he's gay, that's really disrespectful anyways! So you may want to reconsider her, she's trife!
If she tries to hook you up w/other girls.
If she talks to you about other guys, like not really getting your opinion but just in conversation "so on so does this & that & blah blah"...but if she kinda wants your opinion a lot, that maybe an indicator that she's into you.
If she will only text you...now even I must say that @ some point, if I like someone, I want to talk to them on the phone sometimes.



This is when she knows you like her...
When she only wants to hang out w/you if someone else, like another friend, probably mutual, is there as well.
When she actually would prefer that you not pay for her...food...or whatever.
When she acts distant.
When she feels less comfortable around you.
When she tells you she doesn't want to ruin your friendship.
When you kiss her or attempt to & she pulls back or doesn't allow it to happen again.

When she says...she's just not that into you...that's what I would do!

A regular girl should do this...I'm too uh...idk...different...but hey whatever...girls don't play games as much as guys @ least not in this regard...you will usually know when a girl doesn't like you.

Signing off,

~S. Parks

I Confess...I'm a Swinger!

When I tell you I'm the moodiest person I know.
I think its b/c I'm super sensitive but I learned to turn that sensitivity into apathy but sometimes random shit will tick me off & then that same thing may not even shake me 2 days l8r or hell 2 days prior.
I know, I'm a strange character. I don't even know how people deal w/me sometimes, lol, here's the thing...I don't even care. Most times I don't like nobody anyways & those I do like if they left today I have convinced myself I'd be over it tomorrow. I swear I think I don't need anyone except Jesus (but Lord please don't turn this into a test & throw me out into the world by my lonesome, thanks!)!

I think text books call this: a defense mechanism.

Ahh higher education, surely does come in handy *rolls eyes*

Common sense: the more you grow...the more you know & the 1st step in the know is admission.
I've admitted & now I'm content.

Goodbye.

~Shanette the Great!
I'm still fabulous, flaws & all!
Deal w/it!

Permanently Blue.

Fact-I've been in love once & it may just be the only thing I regret in life...sure it's contributed to the person I am today, but I'm not so sure that the person I am today wouldn't be just as great as the person I would've been pre-"in love" & post-"heartbroken girl." Besides, I don't think I'm 1 of those people who believes it's better to have loved & loss than never loved @ all b/c frankly I think I'd be pretty fucking fabulous either way...I mean I'm just saying...

okay moving on...

Fact-I still love him & I'm certain I always will.

Fact-I'm not bitter...I'm jaded.

Fact-I miss him...but I can't quite recall why.

SO...today I was thinking about relationships & stuff & how when they are ending its like the seconds turn into hours & the days to months...the closing last soooo freaking long or so it seems, but technically only a day would've actually passed. Omg! I remember the exact moment I realized I was in love, lol, it was like an epiphany! I literally ran into the bathroom, put my head in a towel & cried & screamed (I knew there was no turning back)! It was a roller-coaster of emotions all wrapped into 1 single, solitary moment. Oh but when the walls came tumbling down around me & that feeling turned me into a prisoner, I wondered if I could 1st save me...btw-why as women do we always tend to blame ourselves when disaster strikes???...anyways, once I figured I wasn't the problem (well not entirely)...I tried to fix "us" & when that didn't work I tried to fix him. In all the unsuccessful fixing I was doing, I had no idea I was working alone. I was just so caught up, I couldn't see that there was nothing I could alone, to "save" whatever it was I was trying to save & in the process I was not only wasting time I was breaking down, running thin & making it worse. Ahhh the things we do for love...man, its crazy. I've been involved w/people before & after him, but I've never been willing to sacrifice myself for someone like that...so when I think of him I think not of the things he put me through but the things I put myself through & I realize I'll always be black & blue...for you, permanently...ugh!

Enjoy the song...I ♥ it...my post continues after the vid.

I hate to say I'm damaged...bruised sounds better, just like I hate to say I'm bitter...jaded sounds cooler.

What's cool about heartbreak? Not a fucking thing...except...the COMEBACK!

& trust me I'm a beast w/mines!

Ahh...but...there's a catch...

...I'm a beast who's scared of love.

Humph.

~Shanette Renea

(I'm certain I'll love again, but never will I sacrifice myself to do so...no one will ever get all of me again, it's just too dangerous besides I'm too cool for that...gotta keep some for yourself b/c trust me they ain't giving you all of them & if they are good for you b/c you have the upper-hand!)

Hungry for Life, Living in '09!

I don't usually do resolutions & goals & stuff, but hey maybe its time for a change!

So for the '09 here's some things I want & need to get done, settled, accomplished, completed, whathaveyou...:

• Get that credit in order!
• A new car-preferably a CTS, H3, LandRover, or G35
• A condo
• My degree & transcript in hand!
• A satisfying career
• A closer relationship w/God
• Read 20, @ the least, books this year
• Start on my own book
• Step my fashion game up 2 notches: buy a designer dress & designer shoes
• Travel more: CALI, NYC, CHI, NOLA, ATL, HOU, Jamaica, St. Thomas, oversees
• Blog more
• Love again, lol, I know, close your mouths.
• Prepare for medical school-yes I'm going!
• Save 5 stacks
• Pay my bills on time
• Lose 15 lbs.
• Pray & read the bible more
• Pamper myself more
• Curse less
• Okay, this is big, even BIGger than the love thing...I'm getting a weave! I know right-I'm so anti weave just like I'm anti-love...well I'm 25 honey & shit changes! I want long hair, don't care :-P lol!
• Stop wasting time on folk who don't matter.
• Take myself less seriously
• Laugh more
• Spend wisely
• Pay my tithes-faithfully
• Invest in properties-NOLA
• Maybe move out of town, I'm reevalutaing
• Listen to the Lord, all the time & let Him guide my path!

I'm hungry for life & ready to live again!

I'm SO ON @ 25 baby & this is going to be the best year yet!

'09 is SO very much MINE!

...saith the Lord!

CHURCH!

~S. Parks

Happy '09 tricks!

Better, Best, & Not so Greats of '08!

I never do these kinds of list, but I felt compelled b/c 2008 was definitely a notable year!

The 'Not So Gr8s', lets leave em in '08:

• The Recession



• the Auto-tune phenomenon



• Sarah Palin-I'm not impressed @ all!



• 2.8 mill jobs lost



• J-hud's personal losses



• not moving to NYC...I'll get there though, don't you worry!



• the term "h8rs", i think its whack



• the wars of the world



• stupid boys & sorry men, ugh! I'll pass!

Let us proceed w/the better/bests lists (in no particular order):

• Best comeback: Brit Brit Spears



• Toughest on the Grind: Lil Wayne



• Best New Artist: Jazmine Sullivan



• Hautest Celeb: Rihanna hands DOWN



• Fave Album(s): Beyonce-I Am...Sasha Fierce (The bitch brought it okay, not even being biased, cus y'all know I ♥ her), DK-Dollhouse, Ye-808s & Heartbreak (I'm being biased b/c it wasn't in my top faves, but he my nigga though so that's what that is), Lil Wayne-Carter iii



• Fave Songs: Young Jeezy feat. Kanye West-I Put On, T.I. feat Rihanna-Live Your Life, MIA-Paper Planes, Estelle-American Boy, Pink-So What



• Fave Movie(s): Sex & the City, The Dark Knight



• Fave Shows: Gossip Girls, Project Runway (I became a fan again, best & last season ever!), Fringe, The Hills, Keyshia Cole: The Way It Is (We ♥ you, Frankie! HOLLA!!!)



• Biggest Come-up: Solange, I like her.



• Fun Times: My #1s made it to their 1st birthdays!; The Summer w/KarmCharm; Quarter-Century Celebration; Banana memories



• MORE THAN A CONQUEROR: BARACK OBAMA, WE ARE HISTORY, BABY!!! I just want to say God is an awesome God, indeed...on so many levels I look @ this as a not only a racial victory, an American victory, a world victory even, but most importantly a spiritual win, this was God's plan...just look @ the race & look @ how the win played out, it was more than a win it was a slaying, a slaying of giants who thought they were just that giants, but giants can be slayed too, as they were & they feel hard! I love my God!
  


• Woman of the Year: Michelle Obama, its obvious she is the force behind the man, not only is she her own person in her own right, she is within him & he within her & you can see that in all of their interactions or even when they are apart...all this while rearing 2 lovely girls! She's beautiful b/c she's inspiring, she's intelligent & she's HAUTE! I ♥ it!!!
  
  

Oh & here's 1 wtf?! of '08 just as a reminder of the state of the world:

• A man had a baby (w/a 2nd on the way!)..."we living in the last days, baby!" ~My Gram

Whether it was good or bad, it was worth seeing & I thank God for allowing me to see yet another year, but frankly 09 is all the way mine. I've said it, I've claimed it & so it is saith the Lord! CHURCH! TABERNACLE! AMEN!!!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

~S. Parks